A couple months ago, I heard about a study done with a group of people who were taking two IQ tests: one with no expectations, the other assumed the people taking the test were college professors. The test-takers did considerably better, averaging around 10 points higher, when they were thought to be college professors. It seems ridiculous--or does it?
I'm in two writing groups. One I joined with a group of people I didn't know. I just heard they met at the B&N and I showed up and go every other week. The members are just ordinary people. Two of them write fantasy, one science fiction, and one suspenceful romance. Okay, I bring my chapters and they critique and I always feel a little like I don't know what I'm doing, as a writer. In fact, once, one of the people asked me if I'd never written anything before. It hurt my feelings, of course, but I brushed it off and kept going. But when I review their work, I never feel like I have anything important to bring to the table and they treat me delicately, like a child, when they're reviewing my stuff. I always drive home feeling a little empty--is this project worth continuing?
I met my other writing group after we were all taking the novel class at the Writer's at Work Conference (with Bret Lott) in June. We've continued meeting as a group. Once a month. One of the guys, Scott, decided to organize it and invited the top writers from the class. The group consists of a surgeon, a physician, a professor at the U, a lawyer, and the others I'm not even sure of. And they don't pigeonhole their work into any particular category. And when I attend these meetings (as I did last night), I feel like a professional writer, a good writer, and I feel like my opinion of their work really matters. It makes me want to keep writing, all the time. And I felt good on my drive home, planning how I'm going to start scheduling more writing time into my days.
So I wondered, what is it about this that is so different? Is it the expectation that I am smart (when the others think I am) as in the second writing group or am I just always the same, just feeling differently by how the first writing group makes me feel, like an amateur?
I still don't know the answer, but I guess I'll keep writing.
